Co-Parenting With Christ: "For the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you or forsake you" ~ Deuteronomy 31:5-7


Uplifting, inspiring, and encouraging single mothers to embrace and enjoy the journey of single parenthood.

Saturday, December 31, 2011

Out With The Old In With The New

“Anyone who believes in Christ is a new creation. The old is gone! The new has come!” ~ 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NIRV)

Every year at this time many people gather with friends and loved ones to celebrate as another year comes to a close and a new year begins. It is also a time when we reflect on the past year and think about all that went well in our lives and all that did not. Those of us that believe in Christ, give thanks for all He has done to keep us and see us through. Many of us also resolve to change and improve certain areas of our lives and remove all the negative that has been holding us back from reaching our full potential. It is definitely a great time to begin again, to do better and be better.

I am very thankful to be here waiting for the clock to strike midnight and say goodbye to 2011 and watch 2012 make its grand entrance. Like many other holidays, I enjoy the tradition of watching the festivities at Time Square in New York, Sparkling Cider toast with the kids, claiming financial favor and good luck with a healthy serving of Collard Greens and maybe a taste of Black Eyed Peas on New Years Day. The entertainment and rituals are fun and satisfying to the taste buds, but I have come to realize that we don’t have to wait until a new year begins to makes changes for the better and receive all that God has for us.

In the spiritual realm there is no time. There is only NOW. The past does not exist and the future may or may not come, therefore it does not exist either. All we have is the present moment that we have been given. And in that moment, every moment we are a new creation if we believe the Word of God. Who we may have been or what we may have done even a moment ago does not have to be who we are right now. I believe in Christ every moment of every day so with each breath that I am blessed to breathe I have an opportunity to declare, “The old is gone! The new has come!”

When the clock strikes midnight tonight many will hug, kiss, and toast to the traditional tune of “Auld Lang Syne”, which actually translates to “Days Gone By”. I will have bittersweet feelings when I hear the song. 2011 was a really good year for me. My family and I were blessed in so many ways. That’s not to say there were no obstacles along the way. But the triumphs definitely reigned over the trials. I had many gains and some losses. Through it all I knew that it was all part of God’s perfect plan for my life.

As the days go by in 2012, I resolve to live in the present moment, all that I truly have, and mindfully live each day as if it were my last. When I visit the past, it will only be for short while to reflect on what I’ve learned. When I venture into the future it will be just long enough for me to plant seeds of hope. I will accept and enjoy the present for the gift that it is, nothing more; nothing less.

To everyone that has taken time out to visit, read, and share this blog, I thank you for your support and hope that in some way my thoughts have uplifted, inspired, and encouraged you. I know that my experiences are similar to many single mothers, women, and men in general. I believe we all have a testimony to share and we can all learn from each other. Writing is my passion and making a difference in the lives of others is my purpose. I wish you all love, peace, blessing, and prosperity in 2012!
God Bless!

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Change Challenges Us to Trust God

“Should we only accept Good from God and not adversity?” ~ Job 2:10 (HCSB)

When we experience things in life that we perceive to be good we have no problem giving God the glory, but for some reason when our experience is contrary to what we desire we typically can’t see God in it. This is especially true when we are impacted by changing circumstances.

When we get a new job or a promotion we sing praises and spread the good news about how great God is, how He showed up and showed out. But when we lose a job or have a change in our income our response is not usually very positive. The key to conquering change in any and every circumstance is having faith, trusting, and truly believing that God is our source.

“We bring nothing at birth, we take nothing with us at death. The LORD alone gives and takes. Praise the name of the Lord!” ~ Job 1:20 (CEV)

The purpose for every experience we have on earth is to bring us closer to God. When He blesses us, it is for His glory, when He allows things to be taken away that we are attached to it is also for His glory. In all circumstances we are to seek ways to use our experience to further build His Kingdom. Sometimes we have to lose what we thought was good to receive something better that God has prepared. As human beings we have a tendency to become complacent and comfortable. I believe God allows our circumstances to change to remin us that our plan is not his plan and in order for His plan to be executed we have to get moving.

“Without change there is no progress.” ~ John Wooden

When faced with adverse change we often seek to blame the person or persons responsible for the change. In doing so, we forget that God is behind the scenes orchestrating the events of our lives, the people involved are merely messengers communicating God’s spiritual direction to you on a physical human level.

In reaction to unanticipated change, our Ego sends us through a series of emotions ranging from fear, confusion, disappointment, and sometimes betrayal. In reality, the change we are experiencing is not about us. It is not even about the messenger. It is about God and His desire to get our attention and align us with His plan for our life. In prayer, we often ask God to show us the way but if His route and calculate distance between turns does not sync up with our internal navigation system we have a difficult time changing directions.

"For my thoughts are nothing like your thoughts," says the Lord, "And my ways are far beyond anything you can imagine." ~ Isaiah 55:8 (NLT)

The only thing constant in the world is change. Seasons change, people change, and circumstances change. Change represents renewal, a different way of doing things. When we fully grasp the concept that change is the only way for our purpose to be fulfilled and God's plan for our lives to manifest we will no longer be discouraged by the detour sign in the middle of the road. Instead we will eagerly anticipate the sights, sounds, and people that we may encounter along the road that we may not have otherwise traveled had God not challenged us with change.

Remember you are not alone...

Embrace and enjoy the journey!

God Bless!

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Contentment is a Choice

“Don’t worry, be happy.” ~ Meher Baba

One of my biggest challenges as a Believer is accepting God’s Will for my life. I have never doubted that God Is, but it can be very difficult to live in the World and not be consumed by it. The World influences our desires and decisions. We tend to measure our satisfaction with life by what the World deems to be “good”. The status-quo is always changing and we are constantly in the pursuit of happiness almost as frequently as the World turns.

The search for happiness will be a never-ending cycle. Because the minute we think we’ve found happiness, our circumstances change and the search is on again. The reality is there is no need to look for something you already have. How many times have you looked all over the house for your keys and they were in your purse, where you’ve always put them? Pretty frustrating, right? The pursuit of happiness outside ourselves can be just as frustrating. We already have exactly what we need and should take note from the Apostle Paul and learn to be content whatever the circumstances.

“…For I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me.” ~ Philippians 4:11 – 13 (TNIV)

I know all too well that this is easier said than done. This is a daily struggle for me. I have learned that the key to true happiness is understanding that God blesses us with life each day not for our own purpose but for His. It is for this reason that we must trust that He will not position us to fulfill His purpose without the necessary provisions.

“The Lord will withhold no good thing from those who do what is right.” ~ Psalm 84:11 (NLT)

I am reading an interesting book titled The Resolution for Women by Priscilla Shirer. In the book Priscilla writes, “Your God can be trusted to grant you the supply you need to excel at His purposes. So if you don’t have it – whatever it is – it’s because you don’t need it. You may want it, but it’s not necessary in order to accomplish what He knows is most important for your life today. Otherwise, He’d have given it to you.”

More often than not we don’t understand God’s purpose for our life. We measure our success using the World’s metric system which leaves us feeling inadequate or incomplete. It may be hard to comprehend that God’s purpose for our life does not require money, a fancy car, or name brand clothes. Are those things necessary to build His Kingdom? Of course we like them. They make us feel good. But are they necessary? Maybe, maybe not.

Priscilla also goes on to write, “Whatever He’s given or not given, He’s done for a specific reason – a reason known only to Him perhaps but one you can trust with full confidence, sight unseen. Every decision you need to make, every task you need to accomplish, every relationship you need to navigate, every element of daily life you need to traverse, God has already perfectly matched up with an equivalent-to-overflowing supply of His grace.”

“And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed…” ~ 2 Corinthians 9:8

Contentment is a choice. We can choose to worry about what we do not have or we can choose to be satisfied whatever our circumstance may be. We must ask God daily for the strength to do what He would have us to do with what we already have according to His Will.

Remember you are not alone...

Embrace and enjoy the journey!

God Bless!

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Let Go and Don't Hold On

Do not refuse to let them go. Do not keep holding them back.” ~ Exodus 9:2 (NIRV)

A few days ago I was having a discussion with a co-worker about raising young adult children. She was reflecting on her experience as a single mother and when her youngest son left home to attend college. She described it as a bittersweet experience that I could absolutely relate to. She said something that really made me think about how I have handled situations throughout my life when I needed to let go. She said, “Letting go is one thing, not holding on is really the hard part.”

Initially her comment confused me a little. It sounded like an oxymoron. How could I still be holding on if I had already let go? But as I thought about some of my past experiences, I realized that letting go of someone in your mind is very different than holding on to someone in your heart.

As I thought back to when my son left home a few months ago, it really began to make sense to me. Accepting the fact that he would no longer be coming home from school every day was the process of “letting go”. Understanding that I can no longer be emotionally involved, solving all of his problems or alleviating all of his concerns was the process of “not holding on”. It was a true detachment of the umbilical cord. Of course that doesn’t mean that I stop loving him or that I can no longer “be there” for him. I will always love him and be there for him, just in a different way.

This detachment process is similar in relationships. When the relationship has run its course we need to let go in our minds and stop holding on in our hearts. When I realized my relationship with my children’s Father had ended, it was out of sight out of mind. I believed I had let go. In my mind I had. He was free to do whatever with whomever. But in my heart, for many years after the relationship ended, I held on to the idea that maybe, just maybe things could be the way they were again. It wasn’t until I released him from my heart that I really felt free to move forward and so did he.

One way to tell if you have let go and aren’t holding on anymore is to examine if your actions line up with your words. My co-worker went on to tell me a story about the day she visited her son at his dorm room to deliver groceries for him and his roommates. Her intentions were good, but the help was unsolicited. Her son was appreciative of the delivery, but at the same time he was concerned that she was having a hard time letting go. As he walked her to her car, he told her how much he loved her and that he would be okay, not to worry. But he asked her not to come to his dorm unless invited. Her actions did not line up to what she had been telling herself and her son about her ability to let go and allow him to begin his journey.

Now that may seem extreme, and maybe we would never do something like that. But there are some ways that we have demonstrated to another person that we are still holding on in our hearts even though we've told them that we have let go and have move on.

This idea of trully letting go is another life lesson that is so much easier to teach than it is to apply. But scripture says that we are to let go and keep from holding on to what does not belong to us. When we refuse to let go AND continue to hold on, we can potentially limit our growth and the growth of who or what we are holding on to. The first step is admitting that you really haven't let go yet. Once you do this you will be able to free your mind, free your heart, and ultimately free yourself and those that may still be in your grasp.

Remember you are not alone.

Embrace and enjoy the journey...

God Bless!